#metoo : Some thoughts and worries


TW: sexual violence

I have written and re written this a number of times today. Yes, me too. I hear you, I see you and I am raising my voice with you. I do, however, have some further thoughts about the complexities of this movement.

1.) The issue here is with the fact that survivors of sexual violence are NOT BELIEVED. Not that we do not speak out, so many times individuals speak out about sexual violence and their voices are not heard or taken seriously, the patriarchal structure of society works against survivors (who are predominantly women) to silence them.

2.) Those that do speak out are categorised as ‘victims’ – they are all to often blamed and are stripped of their ‘voice’. This is a moment to come together and challenge that.

3.) Whoever you are, whatever you feel, your experience is valid. You are believed. You are believed whether you choose to speak out with a ‘me too’ status, whether you choose not to disclose your experience. Your voice or your silence does not make your experience any less valid. We must remember that at this particular moment.

4) Sexual violence is not a “women’s issue”, you should not simply think about it because I have to tell your ‘sister, girlfriend, or friend’ has been impacted. It impacts us all. I hope this movement has made you pay attention, but this movement shouldn’t be needed in the first place. I shouldn’t have to tell you ‘me too’ for you to care about gendered violence.

5.) To those who are reliving trauma due to this, I am sorry. It is not my intention to cause you to distress. I hope you are able to see why I have felt the need to post this.

I have no answer to the issues with this movement, nor do I want to devalue it, it is a place to start but let’s think further and open up a conversation that needs to be had. To my sisters, trans and non binary folk, and all who have experienced sexual violence, solidarity.